Monday, February 27, 2006

Still of the Night

Ever stood on the delicate tip of an apex before?

That is exactly where I am right now.

Vertigo.

Any slight movement, one as light as the flutter of eyelids in your sleep, is enough to send me flying.

What lies there, you ask.

What could have been. And what I can have.

Jump for what you can have! You shout at me, matter-of-factly, with such force it pierces through me like a bullet shot.

Convinced, I tried to take a step.

To my horror, I cannot lift a muscle.

So I tried, and I tried, and I tried.

But to no avail.

You forgot the haunting force of what could have been wields.

Even the most optimistic cannot push that away.

For Darkness resides in all our hearts.

This is not about decorum. Or insecurities.

Would I bother myself with such frivolities?

I need the strength of blinding lights.

To shatter darkness. To disintegrate fear. To carve a new path.

I need it before what I can have becomes what could have been.

And before it gets here, I shall stay where I am. And remain very still.

But please hurry.

I do not know how long I can last.

::past tense:: posted at 2:34 AM.

::This is Me::

chihlin ♠
i'm legal ♠
some standard gemini traits ♠
cps/ahs/tjc/nus fass ♠
that's all for now ♠

::These are my Loves::

write ♠
read ♠
think ♠
dream ♠
sleep ♠
sing ♠
smiles :) ♠
my dear friends ♠
star-gazing ♠
mahjong ♠
ktv ♠
mac breakfasts ♠
cheesecakes ♠
blk85 suppers ♠
dessert counters ♠
hazelnut-flavoured milk ♠
black chandelier ♠
brit rawk ♠
jazz ♠
heart-melting classics ♠
my MJ club ♠
B-Block ♠
you-know-who :) ♠

::This is my Contact::

mail me ♠

::This is You::

Credits

Jessica Stam as model. Images from the Fall/Winter 2005-06 BCBG Max Azria ads.